The Anger Ladder

The goal is to move from passive-aggressive behavior and verbal abuse to a calm, even pleasant response that seeks resolution (level 1 is the most mature and beneficial, level 15 is the worst).  As you look at your own anger in a given situation, assess which number you are at, and try to proceed to the next level up. As you progress, congratulate yourself on the positives (in bold type) you were able to put in place. And remember–you may be doing better than you think! You are aware and you’re ready to move forward.
Source: Ross Campbell, Kids in Danger, pg 69.

POSITIVE

1. Pleasant, seeking resolution, focusing anger on source, holding to primary complaint, thinking logically
2. Pleasant, focusing anger on source, holding to primary complaint, thinking logically

POSITIVE;  NEGATIVE

3. Focusing anger on source, holding to primary complaint, thinking logically; unpleasant, loud
4. Holding to primary complaint, thinking logically; unpleasant, loud, displacing anger to other sources
5. Focusing anger on source, holding to primary complaint; unpleasant, loud, verbal abuse
6. Thinking logically; unpleasant, loud, displacing anger to other sources, expressing unrelated complaints

PRIMARILY NEGATIVE

7. Unpleasant, loud, displacing anger to other sources, expressing unrelated complaints, verbal abuse, emotionally destructive behavior
8. Unpleasant, loud, displacing anger to other sources, expressing unrelated complaints, verbal abuse, emotionally destructive behavior, verbal abuse
9. Unpleasant, loud, displacing anger to other sources, expressing unrelated complaints, verbal abuse, emotionally destructive behavior, verbal abuse, cursing
10. Focusing anger on source; unpleasant, loud, cursing, displacing anger to other sources, throwing objects, emotionally destructive behavior
11. Unpleasant, loud, cursing, displacing anger to other sources, throwing objects, emotionally destructive behavior

NEGATIVE:

12. Focusing anger on source, unpleasant, loud, cursing, destroying property, verbal abuse, emotionally destructive behavior
13. Unpleasant, loud, cursing, displacing anger to other sources, destroying property, verbal abuse, emotionally destructive behavior
14. Unpleasant, loud, cursing, displacing anger to other sources, destroying property, verbal abuse, physical abuse, emotionally destructive behavior
15. Passive-aggressive behavior

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